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Nerd Processor

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Nerd Processor

How ‘Crisis on Infinite Earths,’ one of the most important comic crossover events ever, will work on TV

Avengers: Endgame and the end of the Marvel Cinematic Universe’s “Infinity Saga” may have gotten all the attention this year (and definitely earned all the money), but there’s another live-action superhero mega-event happening this December. It’s the annual crossover of The CW network’s stable of DC Comics series. The heroes of Arrow, The Flash, Supergirl, Legends of Tomorrow, and more will join forces this December to put one of comics’ most important and revered stories on-screen, creating an event that even Marvel, for all its billions, hasn’t pulled off.

To understand this achievement, you need to understand the original Crisis…

Nerd Processor

The Emmys are the perfect time to celebrate a show that was 85% great

The cast and crew of ‘Game of Thrones’ at the 70th Emmy Awards.
The cast and crew of ‘Game of Thrones’ at the 70th Emmy Awards.

If you’re one of the many people still seething in rage over the eighth and final season of HBO’s hit fantasy series, I urge you to keep your TV off Sunday night. That’s when the 71st Primetime Emmy Awards ceremony will be held, and Game of Thrones has a record-breaking 32 nominations, more than any show in Emmy history. Chances are, it’s going to win a lot of them even though its last season could most kindly be described as “polarizing.”

These awards are going to once again kick the hornet’s nest of furious fans who were only just starting…

Nerd Processor

The sad saga of how fandom transformed from being about love into hate and intolerance

Traditionally, nerds were always portrayed as outsiders looking in: Gazing at the high-school groups of popular athletes and cheerleaders, the cool kids, and all the others who never had a Dungeons & Dragons Player’s Guide fall out of their backpack while rushing to class. Things have changed. It’s a nerd’s world, where geeks dominate pop culture and entertainment, and the studios and publishers and so on peek inside, in hopes of figuring out how to constantly appease their new nerd overlords.

As a young nerd, I understood I was an outsider (in fact, it was made abundantly clear on many…

Nerd Processor

A paean for the Wachowskis’ greatest, most misunderstood masterpiece

Last week, it was announced that The Matrix would be getting a fourth installment, with stars Keanu Reeves and Carrie Anne-Moss reprising their roles and franchise co-creator Lana Wachowski returning as director. Despite the fact that no one particularly liked the first two sequels, this new movie will probably make a billion or so dollars, despite the fact that humanity does not need another Matrix movie. Instead, it needs a sequel to another Wachowski movie: Speed Racer.

If you don’t remember the 2008 film, based on the 1960s cartoon of the same name (which was an early Japanese anime series…


Doomsday devices might prove surprisingly useful in the event of the end of the world

Although some of us try to ignore it, the Earth is in seriously rough shape nowadays, and it’s only going to get rougher. There are plenty of plans and treaties and scientific research being done in hopes of keeping humanity from wrecking the planet completely, but we may need to think outside the box if we want to fix things. We need to think… evilly. Which means we need to take inspiration from the worst of the worst.

Here are just some of the ways various supervillains and mad scientists of comics, cartoons, and movies could really help the Earth…

Nerd Processor

Cartoon Network’s lovely, progressive animated series is truly what the world needs right now

There’s very little that’s perfect in this life. Careers, relationships, snack foods — all have their share of disappointments. But once in a while, you’ll encounter something genuinely sublime. Something so good it seems unreal that it actually exists, or that human beings, flawed as they are, could have possibly created it.

This is how I feel about Steven Universe.

The animated series is getting its first TV movie on Cartoon Network on September 2, Labor Day, so now is as good a time as any for people to learn about this little miracle, created by Rebecca Sugar in 2013…

Nerd Processor

Daniel Craig’s super spy may be totally badass, but he doesn’t do much actual spying

Daniel Craig as James Bond walks through a crowd from the movie set of 007: Spectre.
Daniel Craig as James Bond walks through a crowd from the movie set of 007: Spectre.

When the 25th James Bond movie arrives next February, it will be Daniel Craig’s last outing as the titular spy, and the end of an era — an era I’m not necessarily sad to see closed. Craig’s tenure transformed Bond from suave super-spy to a man’s man who relied on his fists and his physical durability to defeat the bad guys. But I miss James Bond actually spying on things. I miss him relying more on his cleverness than his ability to run through walls and parkour. And most of all, I miss his gadgets.

Super-spy gadgets were a hallmark…

Nerd Processor

Disneyland’s newest addition is a nerd paradise that plays out like an interactive theater nightmare

When I was young, the idea of an amusement park based entirely around Star Wars would have been paradise on Earth. Now that I’m 42, Disney has actually created Galaxy’s Edge, and I… well, I still desperately want to go. But I’m also very, very afraid of what I’m going to find there.

If you’re unaware, Galaxy’s Edge is the newest addition to Disneyland, a giant, 14-acre theme park based entirely around the Star Wars franchise. Calling it a theme park may actually be misleading, as it’s supposed to be a true immersive experience, as if you’re actually being transported…

Nerd Processor

The next phase of Marvel’s movies is much weirder than you realize

Now that Marvel Studios has wrapped up 11 years of superhero storytelling with Avengers: Endgame, which has made more money than any other movie in the history of cinema, the company finally felt comfortable telling people what’s next. At last week’s San Diego Comic-Con, the studio announced and/or confirmed its next nine movies, including new heroes, expected sequels, and a few surprises. But the biggest surprise is that the new, Avenger-less Marvel Cinematic Universe doesn’t make much sense.

To be fair, Marvel Studios is in a bit of a trap, even if it’s one of its own making. Two of…

Nerd Processor

The world’s biggest pop culture convention has become its least enjoyable, but it doesn’t have to be

San Diego Comic-Con is a one-of-a-kind experience that everyone who’s excited about pop culture — which is just about everyone — should attend once. And that should be the last time. One visit is all you’ll need to realize that despite the stars, the festival, the crowds, and (to a much lesser extent) the comics, the event has gotten so big that it’s not just bloated — it’s broken.

But it doesn’t have to be. And it turns out that the way to fix a big and bloated pop culture mega-event is to make it even bigger.

To anyone who’s…

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